Poke em On! IV
by taran-ish
Summary: A beautiful, charming, brilliant 20 years old writes the best Pokemon fanfic ever made. written with the skills of a true genius he brings forth a true masterpiece.
1. Chapter 1

A long time ago, in a galaxy far away, who somehow had humans even thou like the hell right? Anyway, there was this planet that is like Japan but with districts and monsters that you put in your pocket and stuff. So like, there was this kid who had growth problems so he stayed 10 forever, also everyone he knew never really aged… never mind so he be like "I have this electric monster mouse thing that I keep calling by the name of its species and think we are best friends when the kid makes him fight other monsters until they faint and leaving them in the wild to die and or capture and enslave them…

So anyhow he was walking on this road ye? And there was this, umm, center where in you put your morbidly wounded monsters and then all their wounds heal and then you make them fight them. So he enters, ye? And there is this lady with pink hair and she be like "bitch put your balls in the basket" and he was like what that is like sexual and I be 10 but the girl with pink hair says like "put you monsters in the basket" and he be like k.

So anyhow the monsters heal and then the mouse says like "pika!" because he is afraid and there was this cat that can talk but he doesn't fight other monsters and he like "give me your balls" and now you be like "you already wrote that joke. And it was not funny the first time because sexual assault is never funny" and I be like "omergerd let me say ma story" and then like the cat takes his balls that are actually little prison cells for monsters.

So they chase the cat because he stole their balls and then the mouse be like "ammafirinmalazor" but no one understands him because he be like "ho look at me im so cute" and no one takes him seriously but then he misses the cat that goes on a rocket that is lunched into space. The rocket was a team. They are aliens. Anyway so the kid be like "I need spaceship!" and like there are these aliens that hear him and say to him like "man I am look sky-waltzer and this is the century pigeon and like" but the kid enters the spaceship and catches the tech who is actually a sentient creature. So he steals the spaceship and finds the cat and the rocket team and they like "give me my balls back!" but then they are censored, because balls.

NEXT TIME ON THIS VERY BAD FANFIC

"Jesus! You are alive! And blacker then ever!"

"Judeth one not by onethest skin color but by ones Sass"


	2. Chapter 2

so the boy with the weird hat and the little monsters he put in his pocket and makes them brutally fight other monsters for his sick amusement was hitching a ride with this space person and his dog engineer thing and he be like "you monster ama enslave ya" and he imprisoned him in one of his magic balls. so now he be like we in this cantina in space with monster alien and stuff, so he sees this robot and he like "im looking for, emm, this talking monster cat and his rocket team, rocket."

so like the robot is like "why the hell can i understand you you petty human? this makes no sense, why all of us speak English? and how the hell does the shiny laser baton work? that is physically impossible!" but the kid was like bitch you boring i need to find the rocket so he grabs this like laser sword and like kills the robot with his fist.

so like he gets a ride to space again and he sees the rocket reaching this huge metal sphere, that is a huge space ship and is called a star when a star needs to be burning and much larger, and i mean death star, that sounds SO FUCKING DUMB. so he be like i need to be in that and the pilot, which is by the way a total jerk and an idiot says like k and he drops him in the huge place and like there is this blue wooden telephone box and then like this one robot beeps and this other robot that is similar be like "exterminate" and he kills like space roaches, but the kid b like "that's terrible! you cant just kill shit! you need to make it fight your enslaved monsters!" and then the entire place flashes in black and white and the kid lets one of his monsters out and its this huge stone worm and the robot says "where the hell are we?! where is everyone else?! how come that monster is made of stone? and how can it fit into this ball? are these balls bigger on the inside?! and does that mean that they are not heavy even thou this stone worm inside?! da fuck?!" and the kid be like "monster attack him with your iron tail!" and the huge worm like makes its tail glow and the robot hits him with laser and the worm disintegrates.

and then like this dude with a black helmet comes in but like sees the fight and just slowly backs away and the robot is like "how the hell did i do that!? what the fuck?! this is not sci-fi! I need a doctor!" and then Zsigmond Froid appears with a samurai sword in a yellow jumpsuit and he be like "I wanna have sex with all the moms!" and then he kills the space roaches and like what?!

Next time on this very very bad fanfic

what do you mean i have no money?

the princes is in another deathstar!


End file.
